Last exorcism.....

WOW. All i have to say is WOW. This movie was a little over an hour, and was really really bad. The main characters were way too over developed and the plot was not. I want my $10.50 back please. It was really short, really boring, and extremely predictable. It would have been better suited as a lifetime movie.
Some good points, the actress who played "Nell" (aka possessed girl) did a really good job with what she was handed for a script. She moved well, and had facial expressions that were perfectly suited for the situation. The film work was done decently well, although slightly reminiscent of the blair witch project. The plot and script had definite potential... until the last 10 minutes. If you don't want to know what happens in that 10 minutes, read no further....
SPOILER!!!!
So it was a cult... a fucking cult. Really? Why. Why would they do that. So over played, so TV movie, so pathetic for them to take it there. It was so poorly done and made no sense. Its like they ran out of script after she got freaky and got stoned and were like "Hey man.. we should totally make this a cult and there will be fire and shit man.. yeah!". Seriously- what were they thinking!
All in all, i give this film (as seen in the theater) a GENEROUS D. If it was a lifetime movie i would give it a C+

Im back... and so is the cheese

Ok. It has been a while. I get it. So here is the latest review....

What to Do...

Do I see "Zombieland" or "Paranormal Activity" tonight...

SPOILER!!

Hello Boys and Ghouls.. here is a "leaked" picture courtesy of forcesofgeek.com of what the new Freddy supposedly looks like in the forthcoming remake of Nightmare on Elm St.
I am personally not a fan, but.. I dunno, i'll still give it the benefit of the doubt. I did enjoy this man as Rorschach. What are your opinions?

"The Unborn", Should have never been born

It was ok. Not fantastic. I was horrified at the start with the dog with the mask on, but my fear quickly turned to laughs when I heard this:

"JUMBY wants to be born now."

Wait rewind...

"JUMBY wants to be born now."

Jumby? Are you freakin kidding me? JUMBY? They could not have given this satanic child another name than JUMBY! I was rolling around laughing (I should add that i was 2 VT brewed Double Bag-ed in) But seriosuly- every time I saw him I wanted to sing a silly song, or give him a giant lolly-pop.

There were some scary scenes, the dogs, the CREEPY old dude who ripped off the Exorcist spider walk... but i would say, all in all, D+ material. Judge for yourself. Did anyone happen to get nervous opening their medicine cabinet?

Image from "The Unborn"

Catch the Unborn

Blair Witch 2009..?

I'm sorry this blog has resolved to trailers and few words, but hey.. images are worth 1,000 words, right? This blog is Donald Trump rich in knowledge of the dark side.. so fresh on the heels of the Freddy Remake here is something quasi-original. I don't know much about the movie and am not sure if its "real footage" or "looks real, but isn't footage".. but it looks like a damn good time! What do you think?

Cant wait I love it!!!!!!

A Nightmare on Elm Street in HD

Do not eat "Coraline" with Mushrooms

"Coraline" is one of the most amazing movie's I have ever seen! How this film was made for children I am not sure... It was terrifying!

The visuals were amazing and when I say amazing I mean out of this world unbelievable. SEVERAL times through out the movie I said out loud- OH MY GOD am I really seeing this? Things that don't make sense make sense. It is a modern day life like Alice in Wonderland.

Through the ribbed tunnel that oddly resembled a fallopian tube in "Coraline" the main character goes into a different world. The tunnel passageway between both worlds was symbolic in that form because she was going to see her mother on either side, symbolising birth and seeing your mother "for the first time". This is my own take on it but I'm willing to take more ideas in!

Things seem great at first then oddly take a weird turn to scare your socks off. This film is 5 star seen with or without the 3D glasses.

Image from alexmasterson.wordpress.com

NEW MOON update

My friends over at at Fandango.com have reported that there are FIFTY pre sale sell outs to the movie "New Moon". I just want all of you to keep in mind the insanity of this- "New Moon" does not come out for TWO MONTHS! Has this ever happened before???

Twilight lights a New Moon?

The world has gone Vampire crazy since the birth of the "Twilight" movies. There are books there are "celebutarts" there are fans willing to do anything that has to to with this new Vamp phenomenon. But is this just? Is it seriously THAT good? Did the world see the same dorky movie that I saw? I just don't get it. My sister who has never opened a non-school book in her life spends her nights reading this series... READING! What! Is fairy-like Vamps all it took to get her to open a book? Why didnt she get hooked on the fairies from "Ferngully" now that was a damn good movie....

Yes, there is sex and love and fear and a new world... But there were all those things in the movie "the Notebook" and "Pocahantus". How did this blow up so big? Would you buy advanced tickets for "Twilight the New Moon"? What do you think?

Click here to buy "Twilight" Movies and Swag

(images from: http://www.fortunespawn.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/blood_spatter.jpg as well as baltimoremagazine.net)

Last House, Good Call

I saw the original "Last house on the Left" in college over spring break with some great friends. It was fantastic. How my friend and I (who are MAJOR horror fanatics) convinced regular people to watch this film at a beach house I'm not sure.

I was nervous about seeing the remake because (we all know how i feel about remakes) of the fear of a classic being destroyed in my memory. This film was ANYTHING but destroyed. It was perfectly mimicked.

It was a modern take on the original movie, but all the same elements were there. The killers still had the same raw punk edge to them, and there was one element I remember distinctly. It the original film the killers shared a sense of vanity that was STRIKING. For example- any time one of the three were hurt, there was an over reaction of ANGER. This is seen in the movie remake with the female killer getting SO angry when she is burned with a car lighter. She gets so mad that it will leave a scar forever, even though she is killing people she does not care- all she cares about is herself. This character in the original gets angry when she is struck with a rock for the same reason- she will have a scar. What I find amazing is that these characters have a trait that could go unnoticed to the movie watcher, yet is a discrete link to the personality of the character. It is smart. It is bold. It is real.

The remake was just as good in my opinion, however I was MUCH more disturbed by the rape scene than I was in the original. It was long. It was graphic. It was scary. I tried really hard not to fast forward through it because it was so graphic and long. It was horrifying in the original as well, however it was taken to a new level in the remake.

The gore was B+ at most, and I will say there is one thing that is STILL confusing me about this film- the ending. I wont spoil it with names and characters but once you have seen it you will know what I am saying- WHY THE FUCKING MICROWAVE. It was cooL- explosion and all- but it was the MOST out of place weird thing in the film.

I would say for the most part, AMAZING work. You stuck with the story but did not ruin it with too much modern bull shit. It was timeless setting and a timeless story- Remember one thing... NEVER let people stay at your house, NEVER go into a stranger's motel room for drugs and NEVER give up trying- its all you got left sometimes.

(Photos from cinemachine.blogspot.com and collider.com)

See both original and remake to compare on DVD and Blueray

True Blood is True Fun

Alright. I get it. Not exactly high class. However.... I am glued to my TV every Sunday night and have even refused leaving my living room even though I could DVR it. I don't know what it is about this show that has people hooked. Its season two now, and the acting is average, and the plot is somewhat silly... BUT I LOVE it. The characters are mind grabbing and easy to fall in love with. The "did they seriously just do that" moments are as long as the show is too short and I grit my teeth at the end of every episode hoping it wont be the end. Death scenes are as violent as HBO could be, and the scariness of the show is as deep as a fish tank. So what is in store for the show? Its hard to tell. I refuse to start reading the series because I am so in love with the show. It will ruin it for me. I will wait until the show gets canceled- which will hopefully be in 10 seasons or so. Check out True Blood on HBO Sunday nights at 9. You'll see.

Check out True Blood The Complete Seasons

"Let the Right One In"

Hey there Horror Geeks.. i got another movie for you to see. I'm skipping the whole.. review thing, simply because i don't want to take the time and write it all out. I just saw this last night and i found it incredible. This is not a paint-by-numbers horror film. It's probably the first dutch horror film i've ever seen. So, you don't have to take my word for it, but see this movie!

"Let the Right One In" on DVD and Blue Ray